Like Father Like Son

August 9, 2016November 15, 2020 ~ Lorelei Savaryn ~ 2 Comments

Like father like son. We’ve all heard this before, right. You look at a son and he tends to emulate his father. Some of this comes from genetics – it’s in his nature to emulate dad. Other parts of this come from his natural desire to be like his daddy, to be cool, strong, confident, rough, bold, etc. Not unlike everyone else, I’ve noticed this aspect about sons for a long time (and not to leave out daughters either!).

But it was not until recently that I (JP) realized that this is the very message Jesus preached during his 3-year ministry on earth. Jesus says “love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you…”. Got it, bold claim Jesus. But ok, I’ll try. And that is how it went for me for many years. But wait, there is more to his statement. There is a second part. There is an answer to the implicit question of “why” should I do this. Jesus says “love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you that you may be children of your heavenly Father, for he makes his sun rise on the bad and the good, and causes rain to fall on the just and the unjust.” It’s all about being children of God. Think about that! Divine children.

What does a divine child look like? Like Father, like son. If the Father loves unconditionally, then the son (and daughter of course) should do the same. …. What is love? …. Dad shows us. He came to earth and assumed a human body and nature, and showed us what love is. Love is unconditional, indifferent giving of yourself as a gift to others. This is the answer to all life’s greatest challenges. When you are so completely conformed to our Father in heaven that you can give of yourself freely in any and every situation, you are completely free, there is nothing that can hold you down. Isn’t that what Jesus was?

So free that he freely offered himself over to a people that not only disagreed with him, not only mocked him, not only spit in his face, slapped his face, and continually tried to trick him, no, this people also went so far as to scourge him, drive thorns in his skull, and then nail him to a cross to die. But Jesus was so full of love – nay, he IS LOVE – that no amount of force from the world could prevent him from giving of himself. And he gave his creation exactly what they needed: redemption from sin.

One day I was praying at mass for God to show Lorelei how much he loves her.

He told me “that is your job”.

Lorelei is now pregnant with our third child. For the first two pregnancies, I did not know Jesus very well.

I knew who he was, but I didn’t know him. I didn’t love him. Now everything is different. I can’t not try my very best to obey him if I am going to profess faith that he really is God. If he really is God, then I must do as he says, right? It’s just simple logic.

Thus, for this pregnancy I have been looking to Jesus in every aspect of our lives. This looks like a lot of service. This looks like a lot of self-less giving to Lorelei and my kids. This looks like a lot of fatigue and near burnout with my other two jobs. But you know what else it looks like? It looks like freedom. It looks like great joy to be able to follow Jesus and obey him, and watch what happens as he sanctifies me and gives me not only more strength to continue to serve, but he gives me joy in the serving. When I reflect on the challenges of the pregnancy, I find great purpose in continually committing to Jesus as I say to him, “Jesus, I love you, and I will serve you by serving my family.

-John Paul

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Lorelei is the author of creepy, magical, hopeful stories for children. Her debut, *The Circus of Stolen Dreams, released* in 2020. Her second book, a magical retelling of *The Secret Garden,* released in 2022. Both are available for purchase wherever books are sold.

Oh Child, I Have So Much Good in Mind for You – If You Would Just Obey

July 28, 2016November 15, 2020 ~ Lorelei Savaryn ~ 1 Comment

In reading the Gospels lately, there is a common theme in Jesus’ teaching that jumps off the page at me (JP). That theme: if you believe I am Lord, then do what I say. I really am the Way, the Truth, and the Life, and I’ve come so that you can have life to the fullest. But, having that life requires obeying me!

Being a parent has granted me the gift of understanding our relationship to our heavenly Father in better ways than ever before. Look at a scenario many parents are familiar with: parent wants what is good for the child, child doesn’t trust parent… But why?

Because sometimes what’s good for the child requires some element of suffering for the child.

The child can’t see past the short term suffering – giving up the toy to the younger brother, turning off the T.V. when mom asks, coming inside when told, …. etc. Since the child only sees the short term suffering, he/she has a hard, if not impossible time, believing that the parent has the child’s best interest in mind. But, the parent pleads with the child – if not explicitly, at least implicitly, subconsciously – to trust, just trust. “Child, if you’d just trust that I have your best interest in mind and obey what I tell you to do, life would go so well for you. I love you unconditionally, I take care of you, I want nothing less than for you to become the best version of yourself!”

But the child needs to do more than simply give mental assent to this claim from the parent – the claim that the parent has the child’s best interest in mind. The child actually needs to obey the parent! Without obedience, there is no growth. In obeying the parent, the child is participating in allowing the parent to shape him/her into the person the parents want them to be. And they want them to be a certain way only because the love them so very much! They want the child to be happy and they know what brings happiness and what doesn’t.

How similar have I been in my relationship with God to how my kids interact with me. Yah, yah, yah, God, you came and died for my sins, I get it. Jesus is God, I get it. …. 30min later when stuff is getting hard in the house, kids are screaming, dishwasher is broken, rain water is coming in the window, … whatever, I choose to sin, I choose not to obey Jesus’ commands in those moments. But if I really believe he is who he says he is, then the answer to all life’s greatest challenges is to do what he says! And what does he say to do?

Love.

That lead to the next logical question: what is love? How do I love as Jesus commands? Love is to will the good of the other. Love, which is what God is, is self-giving, indifferent self-giving. Love is giving of self regardless of the circumstances, regardless of what you will get in return. This is what Jesus came to show. He showed us what that looks like. And then he gave us the answers to all of life’s greatest troubles: do what I tell you – love others as I love you – and you will have life to the fullest. You will be free to freely give! Not to even begin to mention the endless grace he pours out on us when we make room in our hearts for him. If we just trust our Father in heaven has our best interest in mind and do what he says, we will have life to the fullest.

“I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.” -John 10:1

– John Paul

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Knowing Jesus

July 20, 2016November 15, 2020 ~ Lorelei Savaryn ~ 1 Comment

About a year ago, during what I (JP) refer to as my re-conversion to Christianity, I read a book called “Knowing God” by J.I. Packer. It was a wonderful book. It got me very quickly to realize how small I have traditionally made God out to be. But it also got me to realize how far from actually knowing God I was – although I was beginning to know things about God, I wasn’t necessarily coming to know Him. But I wanted to! But the book didn’t give me those answers. It did tell me that God was spirit, and that he is limitless, and all-powerful, but it didn’t give me the answers to my heart’s growing and burning questions: “God, what do you look like?” “What do you sound like?” “What do you feel like?” “Can you please reveal yourself to me? I want to know you.”

A month or so went by after this, during which time I was praying fervently that God would reveal himself to me. I was also reading the Holy Scriptures, seeking to know God as best I could. But all the while, I was calling out “God, please reveal yourself to me. I just want to know you!”

And then it happened. One night on one of my many commuter train rides home from Northwestern – this time it was the 11PM train after teaching a night class – I found myself asking God again to reveal himself to me. And then I heard it, inaudibly, but I heard it, or better said, I just knew. It was an epiphany moment. It was a light bulb going off. I describe it as God telling me. All of a sudden, in answer to my plea “reveal yourself to me,” I heard “I already did. Jesus.” Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope you can imagine my sheer joy, my awe, my satisfaction and peace, my adrenaline and energy, all wrapped up in one simple little moment on the commuter train with people and life going on all around me like a typical 11PM train ride normally contains. But in that moment, in my seat, my life just changed forever. I was thrilled. God had answered my prayer. I raced home and rapidly typed out a long e-mail to a couple of my prayer group friends who had been hearing me pray this request to God for at least a few weeks. I couldn’t contain myself. I had just fell in total love with Jesus, and I hardly even knew him yet!

Since this all took place, I have not been able to keep my eyes off Jesus. I am fixated on him. Like Mary in the story of Mary and Martha, all I want to do is sit at Jesus’ feet and listen to him speak. When I read the Gospels I join the crowd as one who is there in the first century AD, and I just watch Jesus work. I watch God act, speak, move, and love as a human being. It is the most fantastic and precious gift we could ever ask for. For all those asking the same question I asked – “God, what are you?” – here is the answer in Jesus! Jesus is God. Incredible, nearly. A mystery, yes. Does Jesus say this about himself? YES! Why did I miss this my whole life? I think I know.

I’ve heard it said that until someone is asking the question, the answer is un-impactful. That applies to my story here. Even growing up a Christian, it wasn’t until my heart was pleading with God for him to allow me to know him that I realized the depth of the gift he gave us by becoming man. Now I can know him. Now I can know God.

And what I have even more recently come to appreciate is that Jesus is still alive today!

Oh to know him deeply.

-John Paul

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Catholic 101: 5 Cool Facts about Catholic Mass

July 17, 2016October 22, 2023 ~ Lorelei Savaryn ~ 2 Comments

This letter is free for you to read, but it wasn’t free for me to produce. If you’re interested in supporting the work of This Catholic Family, I would be honored if you would prayerfully consider upgrading your subscription. Or, you can always buy me a coffee here.

For some, Mass is a beautifully rich time of spiritual reflection and growth. For others, Mass is confusing! Sit, stand, sit, stand, kneel stand. Lots of sayings and responses that are difficult to follow along with if you aren’t Catholic.

So, in light of a desire to shed some light on Mass, here are 5 cool Mass Facts that you may not have known.

1- Mass is modeled after the book of Revelation

I think there is this stereotype that Mass is antiquated, or ritualistic. However, interestingly, much of the content of Mass is based on the book of Revelation, which is a book all about the future, and of that which is to come. For example, each Mass we sing the “Holy, Holy, Holy,” which is straight out of Revelation 4:8. The idea is we are joining in with those in heaven in their unending hymn of praise. So that’s a real profound moment, if you think about joining in singing the same song those in heaven are singing, and the connection between the physical and the spiritual that is occurring. And that’s just one tiny example. You can do an entire study on Revelation and the Mass. The more you know, the more amazing Mass becomes.

2- There are 4 Scripture readings throughout Mass,and the readings are the same globally.

There’s a lot of Bible each Mass. First, there is often an Old Testament reading (except during the season of Easter, when we read through the whole book of Acts.) Then, there is a Psalm, except instead of it being read, the Psalm is typically sung. Which is cool because the Psalms are originally songs. So, in the Mass we put them to music, and it’s sung responsorally, where a lead singer, or cantor, sings part of it, and the congregation joins in throughout. After that, there is a New Testament reading. And, finally, we conclude with a reading from the Gospels. Often, there is a theme that connects many of the readings, and there are studies available to further dig into the readings of each week. Also, the Catholic readings cycle over 3 years, throughout which, if you are attending daily Mass, you’ll have read through pretty much the entire Bible! And finally, the readings are the same globally. So each Mass, I am hearing the same readings as Catholics in my own town, in Minnesota, Africa, Europe… everywhere! This is cool because I can discuss something about the readings with JP’s family or a friend of mine from a different parish, and we all have heard the same Scripture each week.

3-We say the Creed every Mass.

Christians have shared a creed, or set of beliefs since the earliest days of Christianity. The Nicene Creed was formalized in 325 A.D. It’s a series of “I believe” statements, and is a beautiful, easy to understand representation of Universal Christian teachings. Every single Mass, we stand up together and state our beliefs corporately. That’s a cool moment- publicly affirming your beliefs among others who are affirming the same.

4- Mass is offered every day.

Anyone looking to attend Mass can find one any day of the week, often offered at different times in different parishes. An interesting thing about this is if you think about time zones, and that daily Mass has been a global practice since the days of the Early Church, there is pretty much a Mass being offered somewhere continually on Earth at all times… and has been for… well a really long time!

5- The Making Present of the Last Supper.

Leonardo_da_Vinci_-_Last_Supper_(copy)_-_WGA12732.jpg — The real one. Not the painting. 🙂

Catholics believe Communion is more than just are representation, or symbol, or what Jesus did in the Upper Room. And Catholic belief on Communion actually goes wayyyy back into Jewish culture and history. Historically, when Jewish people celebrated the Passover of Moses’ day, they didn’t believe they were just symbolically representing what happened; they believed they were participating in a “making present” of that actual one time historical Passover event. That they too, somehow, mysteriously, were also participating in the Passover of Moses. In Mass, we believe that Communion is a “making present” of Jesus’ Last Supper with His disciples. That we, too, are participating, mysteriously, in that one time event. There are a lot of connections to Judaism in Catholicism and in Mass as well. This is only one of them.

I hope you’ve found these 5 Cool Facts about Mass interesting, at least, and educational at most! I know I didn’t get to all the sit, stand, kneel stuff in this post- but I can write about that another time. There’s a lot of meaning behind each of those postures as well.

Until next time!

-Lorelei

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What is Truth?

July 13, 2016November 15, 2020 ~ Lorelei Savaryn ~ 1 Comment

Recently Lorelei and I found ourselves in a lovely conversation with a dear old friend of ours from years back – although we only knew each other for a brief time before he left the state for a career move, it only took a few minutes of conversation to be right back in the thick of it. Why do we get along with this friend so well? Because he is open to exploring life. He is open to seeing something from multiple perspectives. He is open to disagreeing, and not having to be right. You see, in this way, we all get to share why we think something is the way it is, and then we look at that thing from as many vantage points as possible without feeling the need for everyone around the circle to think the same thing. Man, I really love doing this. In fact, a hallmark of my dearest friends in life is the proclivity to do just this, to look at something deeply and to investigate it from as many sides as possible. It’s really fun!

So what does this have to do with Truth? Well, first off, what is Truth? During this lovely conversation a nice set of analogies were presented to define Truth (I keep capitalizing the word for a reason, to indicate the ultimate “what is”). Here in our lives, in our physical world, we see things and we think about things, and we form opinions of things – man, do we form opinions about things. But do our thoughts and opinions equate to “what is”? Just because we think a certain way about something, does that mean we actually know “what is” about that something? I don’t think so.

We got to talking and came up with three analogies that I really liked. The first one I must credit our friend – thank you friend (you know who you are if you’re reading this). The first is this: multiple people are looking at a table. One person sees a yellow shiny surface and describes these said features. The other person sees a black rough surface, and describes these said features. But they’re both looking at the same table, how can this be? Easy. They are looking at the same table from two different vantage points, one where the sun is hitting it making it look shiny, the other where shade is hitting it making it look dark and rough. Each person’s perspective describes some aspects of the table, it gives a glimpse of the table, but not the comprehensive view.

The second analogy I can credit Lorelei for bringing up, but not for inventing. The second is this: multiple blind men are feeling an elephant – not knowing it is an elephant – and trying to figure out what it is that they are touching, without of course their sense of sight. One person who is touching the trunk concludes he is touching a tree trunk. Another person who is touching the ear concludes he is touching a sheet of leather. Another person who is touching the tail concludes he is touching a snake. And on and on, each man concluding he is touching something else depending on what part of the elephant he touches.

The third analogy I can thank myself for bringing up, but not for inventing – for that I can thank Catholic RCIA class, where the seven sacraments were likened to the seven main colors of light when refracted through a prism. Here in this analogy we have light, the source in which all the wavelengths are found, that spread out into the different colors we see, all a portion of the whole of light prior to its passing through the prism. To take this analogy farther, and as a result of listening to St. Thomas Aquinas describe God as “that than which no higher thing can be thought,” I find it beautifully satisfying to liken all of creation – every thing that has being – as a wavelength of the ultimate source of light: God.

OK, so what to make of all this? The common theme of each of these analogies is the notion that we see only in part. One application note from this is to consider this when forming an opinion and deciding how strong to hold to it. Can you see it from another perspective? I challenge you to try; trying to see it another way has made life very intellectually stimulating for me for about 9 years now. The second application note is this: how do we ever know the whole of the matter, Truth? How do we know Truth, “what is?”

The answer to “what is Truth” is shocking, for the answer is knowable, and that is shocking enough. But what’s even more shocking is the adjustment to the question it causes; we now also can answer “who is Truth?” Answer to both of these: Jesus Christ. Let this sink in. That is what he claimed. He claimed to be God – God is Truth. He also said “I am the way, the truth, and the life.” He didn’t say he knows the way, the truth, and the life; he said he is the way, the truth, and the life. Let this sink in and the scene in the Gospels where Pontius Pilate has Jesus standing in front of him and asks “what is truth” will likely never be the same for you.

Truth was standing right in front of him!

-John Paul

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Children are Life

July 6, 2016November 15, 2020 ~ Lorelei Savaryn ~ Leave a comment

I write this as my 4 year old daughter is screaming and crying and stomping her feet in the middle of a time out. So, if I can still write this now, you know I mean it.

Felicity, our first little gift of life.

I hope to explore this further as time goes on, but I’ve been thinking a lot about how parts of our society view children. The decisions about how many children to have, how far to space them apart, what kinds of sacrifices are involved, seem to revolve more around the convenience and desired lifestyle of the parents than really looking at the matter from the perspective of a Christian, or, Catholic worldview.

I think those are important things to consider when deciding when or how many children to have, and the Church acknowledges that there do exist grave situations where limiting or delaying family growth is prudent. JP and I have no plans to need a school bus to cart our family around. But, there is a moral and ethical way to go about that planning that doesn’t wrap our fingers so tightly around the control that we shut out God’s movement. But my concern is that we are all too often addressing the issue from the view of society, and not from the view of the Church.

Example- the idea that having more children is going to postpone our life’s plans, are going to make it more challenging for us to have the lifestyle we desire, etc. Thinking about family planning from that perspective is looking at things from the point of view of society- that our goals and ambitions come first, and we somehow fit our child bearing into that plan for our lives. Somehow, bringing children into the world has become about us.

The Church comes at child bearing from a completely different angle. And this is the angle we should be using when evaluating issues in regard to family planning. The idea that children are not a barrier or a cause of delay in our own lives… children are life! They are life created in the image of God. They are life endowed with an immeasurable intrinsic value. In addition to that, the Church believes that marriage is most fully expressed in the way God intended when it is a marriage lived open to the possibility of creating life. We have found that openness to life to be transformative in our own marriage. When you live like that, the perspective necessarily shifts away from what we get out of our marriage, to what we give, and then, ultimately, what we receive from God as a result of our own self-giving.

I think there is a possibility that one might decide to have fewer children than originally thought, in order to pursue one’s life goals more quickly… but then decades later wonder “what if…” Whereas, I don’t think it’s likely that many people, deciding to allow for the blessing of children in their lives at God’s timing, would,decades later, wish that they hadn’t had one or more of their children. Or that they would regret delaying a “life’s goal” in exchange for the existence of their child.

Why is that? Because, while we have plans for our “life,” in the sense of what we want to accomplish, children actually are life. Period. And actual life, God-imaged life, is one of the most precious gifts our Creator has given us. Children are the beautiful life-filled result of the loving, giving union between a husband and a wife. And there are few things more beautiful in this world than that.

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Why We Started This Blog

July 3, 2016November 15, 2020 ~ Lorelei Savaryn ~ 1 Comment

First of all… we’d like to introduce you to our family. Minus the little peanut currently in the oven (due Dec 30th).

2015.10.24-Savaryn-Family-Photographer-Milwaukee-Wisconsin-3309 — There’s me (Lorelei) and JP, Felicity (Lissie), and August (Auggie), who was having a “mad day.”

Hello there, it’s nice to meet you.

There are two primary reasons that JP and I decided to start this blog.

One of the reasons was because of all the loud, shouting voices in the world today. So, we thought, let’s yell too!

Haha. Just kidding.

Actually, we’ve been increasingly disheartened that we a live in a world where people can spurt out their anger in a single status update or tweet, saying something that could immediately isolate and hurt people you might never know have been isolated and hurt because they are just invisible friends scrolling a newsfeed and reading that one update that is sarcastic at them. That is aimed at them. That is generalizing who they are. Those kinds of posts leave no room for what seems to be a fading art, the art of dialoguing with people who have different opinions than you. People either stay silent or they argue. Neither of which are good. It’s been especially sad for us to see Catholic friends post things that seem aggressive on social media. We of all people, should speak truth but in love and humility, not in sarcasm, or ranting, or aggression.

We know not everyone holds extreme positions on things, or that everyone hates those who think or live differently than them, but many of these social media soundbites tell a different story. And it’s everywhere – liberal and conservative, Christian (Catholic and Protestant), non-religious… everywhere.

We’ve found that it is becoming more difficult to find our worldview and our opinions expressed respectfully, or in many cases, at all. I think amidst all the extremism and polarization, there is a large group of people coming at things from a gentler and more middle-ground place- not in truth, but in approach. Many of whom just stay silent among the chaos, and thus, those voices are lost. Part of the goal of this blog is to change that. We will have opinions, and we will be writing about how we are living out our Catholic faith within our own family. And our beliefs and decisions might be different than others. But I hope that we are able to express ourselves always coming from a place of respect and love, and a willingness to dialogue with others. I know it’s impossible to live a life, unless it’s a very timid one, without ever offending anybody, but when truth and thoughts and opinions come from a place of love, you are starting from a much better place. We need to follow the example of our Savior in how we approach matters that deal with humanity- all people who are created in the image of God and therefore deserve respect and mercy.

The second reason we started this blog is simply because we just love our Catholic faith and our family, and living out this beautiful journey of life within that context is something we love to share with others. I (Lorelei) recently culminated a several years-long journey that landed with my confirmation in the Catholic faith this Easter vigil.

Me and Archbishop Hebda on one of the best nights of my life.

I documented my conversion story here. Becoming Catholic has brought more life to my faith, an abiding peace and inner joy that I can’t attribute to anything other than God’s leading me to the Church He founded. JP was raised Catholic, left the Church shortly after we married, but was drawn back through the past few years. We took a separate yet simultaneous journey to Rome, a mercy and beauty and Christ-filled home in which we can live out our Christian faith for the rest of our lives. Learn more about us here. It’s been a beautiful journey. And we hope to share some of that beauty with others.

-JP and Lorelei